Answers to some of your most often asked questions

Kim responds:
I know from personal experience what it is like to receive news of an engagement. It seems like all the air has been sucked out of the room, doesn't it? But there is power and strength in His Word.

Charlyne always tells us that when we find we can't call on anything else, we just need to remember the name of Jesus. His name is all we need to comfort us, strengthen us and guide us.

Our continued faithful prayers are the weapons we use to defeat the enemy. God loves families and has called us to stand in the gap for those we love; to serve as that angel as mediator at their side.

"Yet if there is an angel on his side as a mediator, one out of a thousand, to tell a man what is right for him, to be gracious to him and say, 'Spare him from going down to the pit; I have found a ransom for him'- then his flesh is renewed like a child's; it is restored as in the days of his youth. He prays to God and finds favor with him, he sees God's face and shouts for joy; he is restored by God to his righteous state." Job 33:23-26

Continue to pray for that heart transplant that Charlyne always talks about - that God will take that heart of stone and replace it with a heart of flesh. Pray that those who are in the darkness will be drawn to the light of His love and forgiveness.

"Who among you fears the LORD and obeys the word of his servant? Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the LORD and rely on his God." Isaiah 50:10

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
No, I believe you are now under spiritual attack.

Yes, we do have prodigals who are standers, because the stander gave up and got on with their life. Then the prodigal who has been touched by the Lord understands what their spouse had been doing, starts standing, as they know that God does speak and deliver people from the bondages of sin.

Regarding yourself, do not stand by your emotions and feelings. I can tell you that even if you are married, that is what can get a spouse in trouble and tempt them to fall into sin.

This is another trick or scheme from the enemy. How is your prayer life and reading the Bible right now? Are you praying scriptures with your spouse's name in them? Have you ever fasted? You may need to seek the Lord yourself to have your own spiritual revival with Him to get you back on track and get your first love back in place with the Lord. Then you will be willing to follow your Lord Jesus Christ through the darkest of days only to see the rainbow after the storm passes by.

Don't give up! May I suggest that you ask your Lord to reignite and rekindle your love back in you and in your husband's heart. That may be why he left, also. A fiery dart from the enemy. Please read I Corinthians 13:4-8 with both of your names in it regularly and let's see what the Lord will do!

Answer to your question: I believe that the enemy is hardening your heart, not your Lord. Read Isaiah 55:6-13.

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
Charlyne Responds:

During my stand, I started fasting for the first time in my Christian walk. I fasted many different ways. Sometimes I fasted a full day, sometimes a meal, sometimes I fasted sweets or something special that I liked for a period of time. (TV, Coke, coffee, etc.) There are many different kinds of fasts. You need to ask the Lord what kind of fast you are to do. There is power in fasting and the enemy does not want you to fast. Throughout the Bible, people fasted and prayed.

If you have never fasted, I would go slowly and the Lord knows your heart. I always have fasted 1-3 meals a day when I fast due to my health problems. There is also a Daniel fast which gives up certain foods.

The most important reason that I started fasting was that I felt that Bob was headed straight toward Hell. I feared God's justice as well as knowing His mercy. I knew that our problems were because of a spiritual battle. I felt I had to fight the enemy with as much power as the Lord taught me in His Word. I have fasted for Bob, for our
loved ones and for many other prodigals to save them from the bondages of evil and I wanted to seek God's will in my life.

Fasting does not always have to be food, especially for many people who may have medical problems. You can fast watching television, certain programs, sweets, soft drinks or something else that you like very much. You are sacrificing as unto the Lord. There is power in fasting and the devil hates us to do it!

Read a devotional on Fasting:
http://www.rejoiceministries.org/cc/view.php?month=main&id=2669

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
Ask your Lord to remove the pain that you are going through right now. He knows all that you are facing and all your circumstances. Your Lord is the only one that can help you twenty-four hours a day. If you can do nothing else, call on the name of "Jesus." He will hold you in His arms.

I never knew my Lord as my refuge and protector until I became desperate and had to cry out to Him and see if He was really real. May I suggest you just start reading the Psalms and let them comfort you. Read Psalms 20, 23, and 91.

Yes, you are going to hurt because you have been wounded and rejected by the one you love. Allow your Lord to become your spouse for this season. Ask your Lord to heal your wounded and broken heart.

"...He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted...to comfort all who mourn and
provide for those who grieve in Zion--to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of
ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a
spirit of despair." Isaiah 61:1b-3

I can remember the pain, but it is a scar that is now healed. Trust and seek your Lord for His hope and plan for you each day. Today, your Lord wants you to seek Him first for all your answers.

Now I have the privilege and honor to share God's love for you in this crisis in your life. God will heal your hurting and dead marriages. God will heal your wounded heart. Allow God to help you right now. Seek His face. He will never fail you. Read Psalm 55 and Isaiah 54:4-17.

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Kim responds:
I know from personal experience how devastating a remarriage can seem. But sometimes God has plans that we don't see or can't even fathom. And as difficult as it is right now, we have to hang on to that scripture from Romans 8:28 - "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose." Paul writes about ALL things - not just the good things, or the easy things, or the nice things - but ALL things.

The guilt and failure you are feeling are from the enemy. He would like nothing better than to sow seeds of anger, self-doubt and guilt in our lives. Then maybe we will let go of our promises from God. Then maybe we will give up our stand for a restored marriage and a healed family. Then maybe he will have one more family that God has called under his belt.

You have been called to a very important assignment - to stand in the gap for your loved one; to pray for his salvation and repentance, to be that angel as mediator at his side. Your continued, faithful prayer can make the difference for the one you love.

"Yet if there is an angel on his side as a mediator, one out of a thousand, to tell a man what is right for him, to be gracious to him and say, 'Spare him from going down to the pit; I have found a ransom for him'- then his flesh is renewed like a child's; it is restored as in the days of his youth. He prays to God and finds favor with him, he sees God's face and shouts for joy; he is restored by God to his righteous state." Job 33:23-26

I know this is a tough time. I know you are hurting and hurting for your children as well. Let God be your Blessed Comforter tonight. I pray that He will shower you with His comfort and strength as you continue this journey.

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
Shame comes from the Enemy. You are a child of The King! God is your spouse for this season. Isaiah 54:4 says, "Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humilated. You will forget the shame of your youth."

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray...The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." James 5:13,16

One of the most important things that you can do while you wait for your spouse to come home is to PRAY! "The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attentive to their cry....The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; He delivers them from all their trouble. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all." Psalm 34:15,17-19
Read Psalm 34 completely. Believe in the power of prayer!

Think of how many times Jesus prayed to His Heavenly Father, should we do any less? While we are praying, ask the Lord areas that we need to work on ourselves, while our spouse is gone. Let the Lord change us from the inside out while our spouse is gone. Do not worry about your spouse. Let the Lord do the changing of your spouse's heart.

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
This is a huge praise. Go to the meeting prayed up, radiating the Lord. Just love her. Be sure you have forgiven her for all that has happened and remember she is not the enemy, Satan is.

When I met with Bob's girlfriend, I told her my own testimony of all that the enemy had done in our marriage and how the Lord touched me and changed my life after I divorced Bob.

At the time I met the other woman, her husband would not return their children to her one weekend, so Bob called for me to meet and pray with her. She met me on a Sunday evening at a church service where our son, Tim was the sound man for a singing group. I was honored enough to pray for her at that time of the crisis for her children. But God! After we met, he returned them later that night. She thought I was crazy, not coping with the reality of our divorce, etc. But in the end, she told Bob I knew in time you would go back to your wife.

Be careful all that you say as everything you say will go back to your husband possibly in distorted truth. You are blessed and pray that if this is the Lord's plan, that you will be obedient and speak only the Words that He wants you to say. Pray that you can share the love of the Lord and the plan of salvation. Praise the Lord for you being a light in this dark world. That is Lord's assignment for all of us. John 3:16-17, Acts 26:17-18.


These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
What a praise that the Lord has revealed your problem. You must change first. I have written and taught teachings all about this. Do you list to our radio programs, "Fight For Your Marriage" or "God Heals Hurting Marriages" on the Internet or StopDivorceRadio? You would learn this. Otherwise, you need to consider buying some resources to teach you: "How to love your spouse unconditionally," What Are You Speaking? "Zip Your Lips!", Are You Really Ready For Your Spouse's Return Home?", "My Spouse Has Come Home! What Do I Do?", and "Forgive Them."

These are just a few teachings that will help you change and grow in the Lord. Bob was abusive and then I would react, but the Lord, changed me, to tell me to hush, be quiet. Stop fighting. Love Bob unconditionally. Read 2 Timothy 2:22-26.

Don't give up. Learn how to love and live with your husband who may be an unbeliever, by the power of the Holy Spirit. Read I Peter 3.

We have the material on the Internet and available in our Bookstore. I pray that you will spend hours allowing the Lord to teach you wisdom, knowledge and understanding how to rebuild your marriage on the solid rock of Jesus Christ, when your husband is home or trying to return home.

We also have Bob's book to prodigals, "Finding The Way Home" which may help you both, also.

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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Charlyne responds:
Everyone told me that Bob had his own free will. Then God gave me a scripture: "And that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." 2 Timothy 2:26

These answers have developed in response to questions we have received over many years. May you consult the answers with an open Bible and an open heart, thus allowing God's Holy Spirit to help you find the truth.

To order Books and Tapes go to:
http://www.stopdivorce.org

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